"A supply of tea with milk and sugar would be nice. If it is tea I really like, I like it without milk and sugar. With milk and sugar, any kind of tea is fine. I always bring tea bags with me, so if we use my tea bags, I will certainly like that tea without milk or sugar.
If I am quite sleepy, I would like two cans or small bottles of non-diet Pepsi. (I dislike the taste of coke, and of all diet soda; also, there is an international boycott of the Coca Cola company for killing union organizers in Colombia and Guatemala; see killercoke.org.) However, if I am not very sleepy, I won't want Pepsi, because it is better if I don't drink so much sugar."
"I do not eat breakfast. Please do not ask me any questions about what I will do breakfast. Please just do not bring it up."
"I do NOT use browsers, I use the SSH protocol. If the network requires a proxy for SSH, I probably can't use it at all.
If a hotel says "We have internet access for customers", that is so vague that it cannot be relied on. So please find out exactly what they have and exactly what it will do. If they have an ethernet, do they have a firewall? Does it permit SSH connections? What parameters does the user need to specify in order to talk with it?"
"If you can find a host for me that has a friendly parrot, I will be very very glad. If you can find someone who has a friendly parrot I can visit with, that will be nice too.
DON'T buy a parrot figuring that it will be a fun surprise for me. To acquire a parrot is a major decision: it is likely to outlive you. If you don't know how to treat the parrot, it could be emotionally scarred and spend many decades feeling frightened and unhappy. If you buy a captured wild parrot, you will promote a cruel and devastating practice, and the parrot will be emotionally scarred before you get it. Meeting that sad animal is not an agreeable surprise."
I wonder at what point did someone decide to buy him a parrot that necessitated adding this clause?